The Do's and Don'ts of Status Updates

I'm just gonna throw this one out there, Facebook is sweet. If I visit only one website during the day, it's going to be Facebook. It reminds me when my friends' birthdays are and allows me to view photos of their latest adventures. While I truly love Facebook and how it connects me to hundreds of people, there are downsides to this social site. Annoying application invitations, quizzes to find out what kind of animal you would be and most importantly, status updates. Don't get me wrong, status updates can be useful, but there are certain do's and don'ts when it comes to posting a status update.

Do Post
Anything involving a party or an awkward morning after a night of partying
Don't Post
Anything involving how you want to go out but can't/didn't - that is just lame

Do Post
Any throwback songs that you've rediscovered for the second, third or fourth time
Don't Post
How awesome that country concert was. We all know you're lying to yourself and you are actually pissed about getting ripped off.

Do Post
Anything awesome that may have happened to you, such as: Finding $5 in a pair of pants you haven't worn in a month; finally hooking up with that chick you've been working on for weeks; getting two bags of Skittles from the vending machine when you only paid for one.
Don't Post
Negative comments about your day, whining about how bad you have it, or complaining about life in general. If you really have something to complain about, call your mom or your best friend. I guarantee your 200+ "friends" on facebook couldn't care less about your long day at work. Complaining is just unattractive.

Do Post
Any major achievements that you recently accomplished: finishing a marathon; eating a large pizza by yourself; finally hooking up with that chick you've been working on for weeks; beating Super Mario Brothers 3 for the fifth time this week.
Don't Post
Anything dumb you're doing/did that you know people really don't care about. These things include: going for a run (if you put this i will comment on your status with, "it's about time, you could use a long run"); going to work out (my comment, "make sure to do your crunches, you know why"); just went to dinner with the best guy ever! (my comment "Did he get you the Happy Meal this time?")

These are just a few examples. More than anything, I advise you to think twice before posting your next status update or you could be called out via comments from your friends. Also, please comment with the status updates that you've seen that absolutely drive you crazy or make you question why you are facebook friends with that person in the first place.